Re-connecting – I’m missing out on so much life.

photoI’ve been trying to lift my eyes up off myself recently.  I’ve been praying that God will help me to look beyond myself and see others. It’s hard, right? I’ve been obsessed with fixing myself – analyzing why I act a certain way, why I feel the way I do, why I think the way I think. I am constantly wondering why I am the way I am, how I can I make myself better, how I can better my life, make more money, and be more successful. I’ve gotten so “heady”. Always in my head, rarely lifting my eyes to the world beyond.

I realize that I am missing out on so much life. You know when you go in a coffee shop and you laugh and talk with the guy or gal at the counter? Little moments like that give me so much life and energy. It’s refreshing to focus on someone else and notice them instead of simply staring at my wallet, ordering, signing the receipt and leaving. Noticing, engaging, makes me feel like I am part of a bigger community. A bigger world. We’re all just people, right?

I think that’s why I prefer to study, read, and write in coffee shops. I think its also why I prefer to go to the gym instead of work out at home – I love feeling like I’m a part of something bigger than myself.

I’m not great at noticing other people, or encouraging people I don’t know, but I’m praying God opens my eyes and makes me a little better at it. There are so many hurting people out there. But there are also so many healed, beautiful people. I want to get to know them a little bit better.

Maybe I can encourage someone by simply smiling and saying hi. Maybe someone will turn around and inspire me. I like the thought that either one is possible at any given moment.

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